2:15 am
Not having to get up early every morning and do something productive with myself for a month and a bit may seem to be the escape I needed. But it gets really lonely laying in bed all alone in the house with nothing to do but watch shitty daytime talk shows. I feel so useless at this point. I feel like a lazy bump on a log. It has messed up my sleeping patterns too, where I’m awake all night and sleeping all throughout the day. I’m absolutely terrified that people forgot who i am, but then I’m too scared to talk to anyone anymore for the fear that they hate me all of a sudden. I feel like a terrible friend because I can’t get up and leave my house to hangout with them. I just wish people knew that I need them more than they think. Even if it’s someone I barely talk to. Everyone has made such a significant impact on my life. I wish I would recover and heal faster, this is really starting to get to me.
